I have a problem.
I can’t stop watching New Girl. I started watching it (again) from the beginning on Netflix and I’m straight up addicted. Instead of turning on the news to watch people hate on or stick up for Trump, I simply turn on New Girl and tune out reality. The first two seasons are pure magic. I gave up on it when Jess decided to have a baby in real life and Megan Fox comes in to fill her void. Nothing against Megan Fox. She’s one of the most beautiful humans to stare at. But I watch the show to see Zooey Deschanel shake and wiggle and sing with her monotone voice. I hear that this year is the last season with only a few episodes and it makes me so sad. All those characters are so damn great.
Speaking of great, can we talk about how good The Crown is? I’m obviously watching far too much TV to put off the house cleaning and decluttering I need to do. But for real…how good is that show? It makes me not want to be in the royal family and have endless money. Just kidding, endless money would be rad. But being proper and following rules sounds terrible. One day last week, I didn’t brush my teeth until 6pm. I PLAY BY MY OWN RULES, B*TCH!
Speaking of things other than just melting into the couch and pretending I’m roommates with Schmidt…last weekend we had our annual gym holiday party. When I first started at the gym, the holiday parties were hosted AT the gym. But after someone cutting part of their finger off, multiple vomits on the floor, someone locking themselves in the bathroom, a fight breaking out (which was near a pregnant woman and ended in the couple leaving the gym), drinks spilled in every crevice leading to sticky floors for months, and many, many homeless people thinking the gym was an open invitation for them to make themselves at home…the parties finally moved to an outside location. Aka sketchy bars. And this year was no different. One of the members of our gym owns this suuuupes sketchy bar so he let us come in early and take over. Luckily, I had 3 margaritas beforehand so I was ready to step foot in an overcrowded, cologne-infested bar….and then dance my face off. It’s so fun getting to know people who you work out with based on how they dance. One white guy even broke out in a little salsa. What the?
The best part was that the night didn’t end like many of my previous annual holiday parties have. This time around, I was home on the couch by 11pm (watching New Girl…stop judging) and woke up sober and happy as can be on Sunday. No Sunday scarys for this girl.
You know what else isn’t scary? This recipe. Do yourself a favor and buy cauliflower rice in the freezer section. Don’t try to rice it yourself. I did that for years and it’s hell. It smells bad and the cauliflower crumbs go everywhere. So just buy it, ok?! OK!! Loveyoubye.
PaleOMG 15 Minute Honey Sriracha Shrimp Rice Bowls
- Cook Time: 15 minutes
- Total Time: 15 minutes
- Yield: 2 1x
For the rice:
- 2 tablespoons ghee
- 1 bag cauliflower rice
- 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
- salt, to taste
For the shrimp:
- 2 tablespoons ghee
- 1/2 pound deveined, peeled raw shrimp
- 1/2 cup coconut aminos
- 1/3 cup honey
- 1/4 cup sriracha
- fresh mint
- green onions, chopped
- Place a large saute pan over medium heat. Add 2 tablespoons of ghee then add cauliflower rice, garlic powder and salt. Cook for about 15 minutes, tossing to keep the cauliflower rice from browning too much.
- While the cauliflower rice cooks, place another large saute pan over medium heat and add 2 tablespoons of ghee. Pat shrimp dry then sprinkle with salt. Once pan is hot, add all shrimp and cook for 2 minutes per side. Once cooked through, remove shrimp and set aside. To the pan, add coconut aminos, honey, and sriracha. Whisk together and turn heat up to medium-high heat. Bring to a low boil. This will take about 8 minutes or less. Once the sauce has reduced and coats the back of a spoon, add shrimp back to the pan with the sauce and toss to coat the shrimp in the sauce.
- Place rice in 2 bowls then add the shrimp and sauce to each bowl. Garnish with mint and green onions!
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